christian

Father’s Day Is Not for Me

The title probably got your attention because it seems harsh, however that’s only on the surface. My wife asked me what I wanted for Father’s Day. I told her I was good with whatever and that I did not have any wants. That made me think back to Mother’s Day a few weeks ago. I asked my wife what she wanted. She told me that it was just another day to her and that she did not really care what she got. That kind of hurt my feelings at that moment because I did not understand. I thought to myself “This is her day. What does she mean that it is just another day.? This day is for her, she should have wants and needs.” It was not until later that I finally understood what she meant. I was listening to a lecturer by Venerable Fulton J. Sheen. He was objecting to the notion made by some that God is self-centered because he commands us to love and worship him. Sheen made the point that God does not need us to worship, praise him etc. We need it. It is for our benefit. In a similar way, when a child picks wild flowers and brings it to their mother, It is done out of love because the child wants to show and express love. The mother does not need it. The mother is of course grateful and feels appreciated but she ultimately does not need it. This helped me understand on a deeper level what my wife was conveying to me. I believe the commercialization of these types of days has distorted the purpose slightly. We should honor our parents. Not because it is simply commanded by God, but because it is beneficial to us. We do it freely to show our love and respect. It is not about the gifts, or what we think our parents would want or need. As a father, it is not a day for me to request things or gifts that I want. I will be happy and grateful with whatever I am given, whether it be material things or words because it is not about me. It is about the Love. 

Marriage. A contract or covenant?

Photo by Leah Kelley on Pexels.com

I have heard that the divorce rate is around 50%. We probably all know someone that has had at least one divorce. So much so, that it is quite common to hear that a couple ‘didn’t last’. We hear of couples 50 plus years ago, having marriages that lasted a long time. In today’s time we hear of marriages lasting only a few years. One could assume that the change is because of women’s rights or because women were deemed lower status and therefore could not just leave their husbands. However, I would argue that the change is because the value that society has placed upon marriage in the last half of the 20th century. So, what is a marriage. Let’s go to the beginning. In genesis, there is the creation outline. God made man, and then God made woman from man and for man. Then we are told “Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Gen.24 RSVSCE).  So, we have man and woman together as one flesh. This is the marriage from the beginning. In time, humans have deviated and have started to divorce one another for whatever reasons. In the Gospels, the Pharisees questioned Jesus about marriage and divorce. 

“And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, ‘Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?’He answered, ‘Have you not read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one’? So they are no longer two but one. What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder” (Matt.19:3-6 RSVSCE).

Jesus made it clear that a marriage is an inseparable union. So how did we get to where we are today? I believe it is a mix of moral corruption in society and an influx of the nonreligious steering away from religion. I personally believe that King Henry VIII flight from Catholicism and into Protestantism as the Head of the Church of England over his divorce was the start of decadence. This decadence has progressed into America. Today’s consensus is that marriage is just a piece of paper. A contract, if you will that can be dissolved as simple as going down to the courthouse and filling out paperwork. It probably does not help that most of the Christianity in America is protestant which has a loose idea of marriage. There are also more people leaning toward nonreligious more every day. The idea of the hookup culture in today’s movies, and media also plays a role in the degradation of the concept of marriage. We, as a society, especially Christians, have to get back to the true concept of marriage. Whether you’re a Catholic or one of the Protestant denominations, we must get back to the true concept of marriage. Two people, male and female, giving their free consent in love to form one union sealed by God himself that can never be broken by man.