What happens when someone in a marriage breaks their vows? You probably have had this either happen to you, done it yourself or know someone who has. I have heard a few years ago that the divorce rate was around 50 percent. If one looks around at society today, the solution is divorce. One often hears ‘oh he cheated on you, divorce him, you deserve better’. It seems that people are willing to throw away a person rather than fix the issues. It also seems that people are marrying with the intentions that the spouse has to be perfect, or that they go into the marriage with the thought ‘If they do x, I am gone’. People place special requirements upon their marriage. The issue with that is that is not unconditional love. We have to love our spouses unconditionally. What does this love look like? In the bible, Jesus tells us “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; even as I have loved you, that you also love one another” (John 13:34 RSVSCE). We know that Jesus loves us unconditionally. St. Paul in his letter to the Ephesians goes into further details for married couples.

“Wives, be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church, his body, and is himself its Savior. As the Church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,that he might present the Church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Even so husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself” (Eph.5:22-28 RSVSCE).

This is the type of love that should be displayed. As married people, we should love our spouses the same way God loves us: without any conditions placed upon one another. As humans, we all sin. Even the greatest saints have sinned. Despite our sins, God still love us. When we lay down our sins at the feet of God, he forgives us. So too when we screw up in marriage, we need to forgive and love each other. We need to work on the issues as a couple. 

With all that said, I think the biggest issue is that people have misconstrued what a marriage actually is. In my next post, I will talk about marriage. I will talk about what it is, where it comes from and modern misconceptions that nonreligious society has placed upon it.